“I don’t even know how to stop. I’m either doing something or feeling guilty that I’m not.”
That’s what someone said in the Wine O’Clock Room this week.
Everyone in the room nodded.
It hit hard because it wasn’t about drinking at all.
We tend to be always on.
Making sure everyone’s fed, emailed, reminded, calmed down, cheered up, and got the right stuff.
Even when the house goes quiet, your brain doesn’t.
You sit down and suddenly remember you haven’t taken the chicken out, or sent the form in, or replied to that message from two days ago.
Being still feels weird.
Like you’re bunking off.
And here’s the bit we don’t always realise:
That feeling of not knowing how to stop is often what the wine’s helping with.
So it’s no wonder the evening drink becomes the off switch.
It’s the only pause we’ve let ourselves have.
Which got me thinking.
What would five minutes of not being useful look like?
Not productive.
Not responsible.
Not “just getting ahead for tomorrow.”
Just five minutes where you’re not needed.
To sit there and do sod all.
Even if it makes you uncomfortable, because if you don’t, that quiet voice never gets a word in.
It’s the one that tells the truth.
It says:
“I’m bloody exhausted.”
“This isn’t working.”
“I want more than this.”
“I don’t feel like myself anymore.”
That voice is where the clarity lives.
But we don’t stop long enough to hear it.
We just keep going until something breaks.